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Index to poems and readings for the 15 other parts of Wedding Ceremonies
For some the crushing of the wine glass will symbolize their willingness to share in both the joys and the disappointments
of life. The use of the wine cup or Loving Cup at a wedding is an ancient tradition, it was common for the
Celtic people to toast each other with a ceremonial Loving Cup. In Scotland this cup is known as a quaich, which comes from
the Celtic word cuach, meaning cup. The traditional quaich is shaped like a 2 handled bowl and often has a inlaid Celtic design.
Some couples choose use a crystal wine glass and have their names and the date of their wedding etched in glass. The original
tradition of the Loving Cup ceremony is for the bride and groom to share their first drink together as wife and husband and to
show the coming together of two families for this reason it is often used in interfaith marriage ceremonies. Special words can be added to include the Bride and Groom's parents (and friends) as part of this ceremony.
The cup is then passed down from generation to generation, ensuring happiness and good fortune to all who drink from it.
This is a special moment for the couple to toast their love, devotion, and friendship.
In the Jewish tradition the crushing of
the glass symbolizes the destruction of the temple. There are many variations. Where there are two parts the drinking of the wine is sometimes in the first part of the service and the
crushing of the glass at the end. For many the glass is simply shared as a symbol of the marriage and the glass is
not crushed. The placement of the Wine Cup Ceremony in the wedding depends on which ceremony is used and its
symbolic meaning.
12-A
Part I: This cup of wine is symbolic of the cup of life. As you share the one cup of wine, you undertake to share all that the future may bring. All the sweetness life’s cup may hold for you should be the sweeter because you drink it together. Whatever drops of bitterness it may contain should be less bitter because you share them.
Blessed are you, O God, creator of the universe, who are the source of all gladness and joy. Through your grace we attain affection, companionship and peace. Grant, O God, that the love which unites this bride and groom may grow in abiding happiness, be ennobled through their devotion to each other. May there be peace in their home, quietness and confidence in their hearts. Amen.
The glass is shared.
Part II: As the temple of Jerusalem, though shattered, lived and lives on in the spirit of the people, so may the spirit of love be ever alive within and around you.
The glass is crushed.
12-B
Part I: As you share the cup of wine, you undertake to share all that the future may bring. All the sweetness life’s cup may hold for you will be the sweeter because you drink it together. Whatever drops of bitterness it may contain will be less bitter because you share them.
The glass is shared.
Part II; Your loyalty, and , is to each other and to the many cups which you will fill for each other. As the temple of Jerusalem, though shattered, lived and lives on in the spirit of the people, so may the spirit of love be ever alive within you and around you.
The glass is crushed.
Into this goblet we pour sweet and bitter wine, even as life itself will pour into this marriage its rich and varied wines of experience. Only in the deepest companionship of shared love may its bitterness be so blended with the sweet that your life together may be full and brave.
Groom: I offer this cup of life to you, to share in all its sorrows and its joys.
Bride: I share this cup of life with you that we may partake of a common life together.
The glass is crushed.
In accordance with ancient tradition we wish that the years of your marriage be not less than the time it would take to fit these fragments together again.
Throughout the ages of humanity wine has been used for celebration. At many times and among many peoples wine has signified life and a life of plenty. At many times and among many peoples, drinking wine from a common cup has been the mark of a deeper sharing. May you be blessed by life. May this cup of wine be a symbol of your lifelong communion of spirit, mind, and being.
The glass is shared.
-Gordon Gibson The years of our lives are a cup of wine poured out for us to drink. The grapes, when they are pressed, give forth their good juices for the wine. Under the wine press of time our lives give forth their labor and honor and love. Many days you will sit at the same table and eat and drink together. Drink now, and may the cup of your lives be sweet and full to running over.
The glass is shared.
-Kenneth L. Patton The years of life are as a cup of wine poured out for you to drink. This Loving Cup contains within it a wine with certain properties that are sweet and symbolic of happiness, joy, hope, peace, love and delight.
This same wine also holds some bitter properties that are symbolic of disappointment, sorrow, grief, despair, and life's trials and tribulations.
Together the sweet and the bitter represent "Love's Journey" and all of the experiences that are a natural part of it. For all who share the wine from this Loving Cup, so may you share all things from this day on with love and understanding.
Those who drink deeply from the Loving Cup with an open heart and willing spirit, invite the full range of challenges and experiences into their being for themselves and the Bride and Groom.
(Officiant pours wine into the Loving Cup and holds it up.)
This cup of wine is symbolic of the cup of life. As you all share the wine from the Loving Cup, you undertake to share all that the future may bring. It represents the blessing given and passed on to each participant in this ceremony.
All the sweetness life's cup may hold for each of you will be the sweeter because you drink it together. Whatever drops of bitterness it may contain will be less bitter because you share them.
Drink now, and may the cup of your lives be sweet and full to running over.
After family and friends have sipped wine from the Loving Cup, it is passed back to the Officiant. The Officiant holds up the Loving Cup and says the following.
Wine Glass and Grapes
This Loving Cup is symbolic of the pledges you have made to one another to share together the fullness of life. As you drink from this cup, you acknowledge to one another that your lives, separate until this moment, have now become one.
Officiant hands the Loving Cup to Bride and Groom.
Now drink to the love you've shared in the past.
Drink to your love in the present, on this your wedding day.
And drink to your love in the future and forever more!
As you have shared the wine from this Loving Cup, so may you share your lives. May you explore the mysteries of the Loving Cup and share in the reflection of love in one another's soul. From love all things proceed and unto love they must return.
May you find life's joys heightened, it's bitterness sweetened, and all of life enriched by blessings upon you (or. . . and all of life enriched by the love of family and friends).
12- G
The years of our lives are a cup of
Wine poured out for us to drink. The grapes when they are pressed give
Forth their good juices for the wine. Under the wine press of time our lives
Give forth their labor and honor and love. Many days you will sit at the same table
And eat and drink together. Drink now, and may the cup of your lives
Be sweet and full to running over.
Some couples have found these books helpful. Most are available from your local library or bookstore.
With These Vows, I Thee Wed: Contemporary Vows for Today's Couples by Barbara Eklof
Wedding Poems and Quotations edited by Rosemary Fox
Words for Your Wedding: The Wedding Service Book
Interfaith Wedding Ceremonies: Samples and Sources by Joan Hawxhurst
Wedding Vows: How to Express Your Love in Your Own Words by Peg Kehret
I Do: A Guide to Creating Your Own Unique Ceremony by Sydney Barbara Metrick
Wedding Readings: Centuries of Writing and Rituals for Love and Marriage by Eleanor C. Munro
Write Your Own Wedding by Brill, Halpin, and Genne
First let us suggest that you read and discuss a few questions that other couples have mentioned as important when you are planning to spend your life together. Some I am sure you have already discussed, others may not have occured to you yet.
Next we invite you to create your own wedding, as different as your own love story. Planning your celebration can be a rich experience that you will cherish throughout the years of your marriage.
Not many people are prepared to start with a blank page and write a marriage ceremony or even select the
music. Our collection is to help you do it.
But the collection is a tool, nothing more. Use it if it is helpful. Most of the material has been edited and adapted.
All have been edited for gender inclusiveness. You are free to further edit and adapt. Edit rewrite, take part of
one item and link it to another, omit sections, etc. Write any of it that you wish, make it uniquely yours.
12-C
12-D
The bride drinks.
The groom drinks.
12-E
12-F
The Bride and Groom sip from the Loving Cup
The Bride and Groom sip from the Loving Cup
The Bride and Groom sip from the Loving Cup and hand it back to the Officiant
Chalice Ceremony
There are 12 other sections in our book with alternate selections (e.g. Readings 1-A, 1-B, 1-C, etc.) in each section. There is nothing sacred about the order (1 and 2 are often reversed), nor do all sections have to be used. The sections are:
1. Readings
2. Greeting and Welcome to Wedding Guests
3. Homily to the Bride and Groom
4. Prayer or Meditation
5. Presentation of the Parents ( for younger couples)
At a minimum you could just go through and pick out one from each section and you have a marriage ceremony. But you may want to honor things from your religious traditions, particularly if yours is an interfaith marriage, or include a favorite poem. If you are looking for a particular value you wish to have in the service and are unable to find it, get back to us and we will either find it or write it. If you have written or know of a complete service that you wish to use, that is fine too.
There is also a section 13 which gives a variety of
Unity Candle Services, designed for
including children from previous marriages in wedding ceremony.
The final section with the Water Blessings .
Or you may choose to include a broom, to sweep away past hurts, and a chalice of wine, to represent their combined spirits. The expression Tie The Knot comes from the Handfasting Ceremony where a cord, usually red, was tied around the couple's hands.
